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A funny as **** poemFollow

#1 Jun 05 2004 at 7:36 AM Rating: Default
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"The O.J. Murder Trial" By Dr.Suess

I did not kill my lovely wife.
I did not slash her with a knife.
I did not bonk her on the head.
I did not know she was dead.
I stayed at home that fateful night.
I took a cab, then took a flight.
The bag i had was just for me.
My bag! My bag! Hey, leave it be.
When i came home I had a gash.
My hand was cut from broken glass.
I cut my hand on broken glass.
A broken glass did cause that gash.
I have nothing, nothing to hide.
My friend, he took me for a ride.
Did you take this person's life?
Did you do it with a knife?
I did not do it with a knife.
I did not, could not kill my wife.
I did not do this awful crime.
I could not, would not anytime.
Did you hit her from above?
Did you drop this bloody glove?
I did not hit her from above.
I cannot even wear that glove.
I did not do it with a knife.
I did not, could not kill my wife.
I did not do this awful crime.
I could not, would not, anytime.
And now I'm free, I can return.
To my house for which i yearn.
and to my family whom i love.
Hey now I'm free-- Give back my glove!!

ha..lemme know what you think..

btw. I didn't write it. I got it in an email




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#2 Jun 06 2004 at 10:35 AM Rating: Decent
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I'm not sure how I should respond. Funny? YEah, I'll go with that.
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#3 Jun 06 2004 at 10:48 AM Rating: Decent
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O.o
o.O
O.O

That's... uhh.... I seriously don't know how to espond to that.
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#4 Jun 06 2004 at 11:34 AM Rating: Decent
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Thats funny, read this one.

My First Time...

The sky was dark
The moon was high
All alone just her and I
Her skin so soft
Her legs so fine
I ran my fingers down her spine
I don't know how but I tried my best
To put my hands upon her breast
I remember my fear
My fast beating heart
As she slowly spread her legs apart
And then I did it I felt no shame
All at once some milky white stuff came
At last it's finished
It's all over now
My first time ever









...Milking a cow.

I just think that one is funny.
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#5 Jun 06 2004 at 2:16 PM Rating: Good
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Hmm. Those all pale in comparison to this poem:

A beautiful butterfly came floating by,
And landed on my cheek, just a smiget form my eye.
I said to my little friend,
"Get the f`ck off me, bug!"

Twiztid
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#6 Jun 06 2004 at 2:59 PM Rating: Decent
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Quote:
Hmm. Those all pale in comparison to this poem:

A beautiful butterfly came floating by,
And landed on my cheek, just a smiget form my eye.
I said to my little friend,
"Get the f`ck off me, bug!"

Twiztid


I never realized you had such a hidden talent Twiztid.
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#7 Jun 06 2004 at 3:30 PM Rating: Decent
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"I did not hit her from above.
I cannot even wear that glove.
I did not do it with a knife.
I did not, could not kill my wife.
I did not do this awful crime.
I could not, would not, anytime. " - this part sounds like something fomr dr.seuss's green eggs and ham ... but i like the poem it's nice. Well not literally nice, but you know.
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#8 Jun 06 2004 at 3:33 PM Rating: Decent
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okay i'm retarded, it is by dr. seuss. i should start reading things better.
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#9 Jun 06 2004 at 3:44 PM Rating: Decent
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/sigh Smiley: disappointed

Edited, Sun Jun 6 21:02:19 2004 by Tape
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#10 Jun 06 2004 at 4:35 PM Rating: Good
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Quote:
I never realized you had such a hidden talent Twiztid.
Bam!

Twiztid
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#11 Jun 06 2004 at 8:50 PM Rating: Decent
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Well here's my poem:

*** is good
*** is fine
Doggy Style
Or 69
Just for fun
Or gettin paid
Everyone loves gettin laid!

^^

The poem by doctor suess was good too, mad me chuckle
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#12 Jun 09 2004 at 6:02 AM Rating: Decent
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Quote:
*** is good
*** is fine
Doggy Style
Or 69
Just for fun
Or gettin paid
Everyone loves gettin laid!


lol, that poem is awesome
#13 Jun 09 2004 at 6:33 AM Rating: Good
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Amusing.
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#14 Jun 20 2004 at 9:42 AM Rating: Default
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Quote:
Hmm. Those all pale in comparison to this poem:

A beautiful butterfly came floating by,
And landed on my cheek, just a smiget form my eye.
I said to my little friend,
"Get the f`ck off me, bug!"

Twiztid
um u didnt wrigth that fool, ICP did
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#15 Jun 20 2004 at 10:57 AM Rating: Good
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I didn't see any claim to authorship in that post. Admittedly, no credit given, but as the material was from a nationally known source, was that really needed?

Quit nitpicking. Leave that to people who are good at it.
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#16 Jun 20 2004 at 12:39 PM Rating: Good
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Um, you didn't write that, fool. ICP did.

FTFY. Horrible grammar and spelling.

And yes, I know that this is from the Carnival of Carnage, you dolt. Did I ever claim that I had written it? I even posted a link to the ICP website in another post.

Please take your head out of your a[/i]ss [i]before you try to post here. Thanks.

Twiztid
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#17 Jun 20 2004 at 1:46 PM Rating: Decent
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Um that is neither funny, it is like if DR/Seuss himself is on Crack!!!
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#18 Jun 20 2004 at 1:48 PM Rating: Decent
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Twizted that was funny, i always beleived in you twizted, U might be the next Bethoven, was bethoven even a poem maker, erm writer thing person?
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#19 Jun 20 2004 at 2:07 PM Rating: Good
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He composed operas, actually, which are in no way similar to poetry, besides the obvious artistical link. Jeez, what are they teaching you kids in school these days?

Twiztid
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#20 Jun 21 2004 at 10:14 AM Rating: Decent
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Holy ten years ago batman!!
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#21 Jun 21 2004 at 10:51 AM Rating: Good
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^^ Smiley: laugh

No kidding, right?

Twiztid
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#22 Aug 13 2004 at 11:06 AM Rating: Decent
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>.>
<.<
..*laughs to self*
I didn't think the horrible and slightly disturbing poem was funny..nooo way!

-t3h ashes
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#23 Aug 27 2004 at 11:16 PM Rating: Default
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thats not twizted.. thats shaggy 2 dope from ICP
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